You
The fear is big today,
Too complicated to even say,
You are in control now,
In my head, me and you have many a row.
You dictate my risky moves,
And 10 percent of the day I lose.
My want to die to is so strong,
I don’t follow all the rules and everything is wrong.
I don’t want to listen to you,
I want to go a day where I just get through.
But you are oh so loud,
And the things I do don’t make me proud.
You are in control and I don’t like it.
I’m at the bottom of the deep and very dark pit.
Rock bottom has a basement and I didn’t even know.
This is now, for my life, all I have to show.
A lifetime of anxiety and a bunch of years in and out, risky and done.
This is not a life to live for, this has been the complete opposite of fun.
You can go away now please
I’m begging you now, I’m on my very knees.
You haunt me, abuse me, murder him, murder her.
I now wait for all these horrible things to occur.
It fills me with dread,
It fills up every inch of my head.
Please, please, please, I need to be gone, it’s my time I swear.
I need to save them and protect them, there’s only 1 way, I’m sorry it’s going to end this way. I know it’s not fair.
But you win,
I’m well and truly in the bin.
